Life Secrets


No doubt first dates can be frustrating and pressful (a lot of pressure and stressful).  We can’t eliminate the first date process from our dating life.  Who hasn’t been through a bad date at least once?  Some dates end up as a nightmare leaving you with a “date-o-phobia”.   

But if you know how to handle it, it can pass without any discomfort.  The problem is in the impression we leave on our date.  Avoiding these common mistakes can end up with a successful first rendez-vous and might lead you to a second and third meeting.

You must never ever, ever, do the following on your first date:

  • Avoid wearing grandma’s underwear (for women)

Forget about your “period” underwear when you’re on a first date, even if it makes you feel comfortable (I know the feeling).  Don’t even think of those high waist tight panties which sucks your belly to the inside.  What if the night turned out to be YOUR night?  Just wear your new sexy lingerie for such an occasion; red or black would be just fine.  Nobody knows where you might end!

BUT don’t wear anything too sexy.  I hope your first date won’t be in a club, you need to hear each other out.  Wear something teasingly elegant instead, or cute casual, depending on where he’s taking you.

  • Arrive late
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This applies to both of you.  Having the idea that arriving late is sexy is definitely WRONG and outdated.  It is disrespectful for your date; you will be giving them the vibe that you’re more important.  Their time is also valuable.  If by any chance you had to be late, you can always send an informing message and apologize about it.

  • Bring someone with you
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Bringing your friend or your sister with you on your first date? Really? Well forget it! I advise you to stay home. Don’t even try to go on first dates anymore, you’re not a first date material my friend.

  • Check your phone all the time and take pictures for your page

Are you by any chance going out with your phone or with the person facing you? Can you really focus on any word he/she is saying or are you the Bionic Woman? Your friends’ pictures on social media can wait for your ALONE time (usually in the toilet or before bedtime), not on your first date. And taking a picture of your dish on your first date to post it online is not cool!

  • Act rude with the staff

If the waiter forgot to get your extra Parmesan on the side, you don’t have to shower him in front of everyone making your date feel uncomfortable.  We all make mistakes at work, no need to be lumpatious.  I bet it will be the last time you will ever see your date’s face again after looking like a douchebag in front of him/her.

  • Order the most expensive dish

This applies to women.  If you’re sure you’re being invited to this dinner, that does not mean that you can order the most expensive dish on the menu just because you’re not paying!  It’s nice to be galant and order humbly.

On first dates, always eat at your favorite restaurant, because if the date goes bad, at least you got a good meal.

  • Green salad your main dish (clearly for women)

On the other hand, ordering a green salad as your main dish to prove that you’re watching your diet is also a bummer.  How are you supposed to go on with the rest of your exciting night if you’ve just had a light salad?  Where will your energy come from woman!

  • Don’t eat dishes that stick in the teeth
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You can always get your floss with you, but why worry all night if any green residues are left between your teeth? 

  • Talk about your ex

And here comes the bomb!  We all had exes before first dates.  That does not mean that your date has to bear the consequences of your breakup.  Whatever you say about your ex, whether you’re heartless or still hung-up, this will not help.  Either get over him/her or go back to him/her!

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By the way, talking about your kids all night is also a turn off.  Try to avoid it as much as you can, we all know your kids are your life, but not tonight.

  • Mind your language

Swearing is in general rude. What if it was on your first date?  Although you might look hilarious and cute, but you will end up looking like an “in-your-face” kind of person.

  • Check your appearance regularly
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Imagine sitting with a woman who is constantly checking her hair and her lipstick through the knife or spoon.  Frankly, it’s a total shut down.  It’s good to take care of your appearance… but in front of the mirror in your room or in the restaurant restroom, not AT THE TABLE!

  • Come on too strong
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Showing interest in the conversation is a must.  But coming on too strong is frightening and creepy.  If you’re looking for an exciting night, well you’re far from it. 

  • Talk about yourself all night
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It’s essential to share the conversation, so talking ONLY about you?? No no no.  Give the hand to your date, show them you’re interested in what they say.  Don’t you want to know more about them?

  • Talk about the future
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Women mainly make that mistake.  We are eager to meet our future other half and from the first date, we build dreams of our kids and our decorated home with a backyard… and a dog.  Do you know how scared your date will be if he knows what’s going on inside your mind?  So try not to unveil your true thoughts and go with the flow.

  • Look at your watch constantly

It is so annoying to be with someone who’s frequently checking his/her watch.  Is he/she bored, is he/she not enjoying my company? It’s so demeaning. Just Leave!

  • Get drunk
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First dates are usually for knowing more about each other and giving the first impression.  Getting drunk is fun, and you might be the kind of person who is entertaining and cute when wasted.  But not on the first date.  You need to be 100 percent sober to decide whether there will be a second date or not.

  • Ask too many questions
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You are on a date, not an interrogation. Ask the necessary questions ONLY.

  • Offer life advice

Some people might find it offensive if you offer them a life advice. If they open up to you, just give them all your concentration and keep your ears opened.  Stay away from getting too personal.  You’re on a date, not in a therapy session.

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  • Talk about sex

Don’t talk about sex if you’re looking for a long relationship, unless you’re looking to get laid. But if not, leave him to his imagination.

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  • Ignore the bill

Even if we women like to be pampered especially on the first date, these days, it’s noble to ask to about splitting the bill.  At least reach for your wallet, leaving him the choice (I know you will judge him accordingly, but do it anyway).

  • Let him know that you googled him
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Googling your date and checking out his social media is a normal step we do before going out with them.  But that doesn’t mean that they need to know this.  It might look as if you’re stalking them; creepy!

  • Call him or text him the next day (surely for women)
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Yes, I’m old school. And till today, I still believe that giving some space to your date adds some enthusiasm for him.  He will definitely wonder why he hasn’t heard from you, why haven’t you called him or texted him to talk about your date night?  This will certainly drive him to get in touch with you.  That feeling when he calls after the first date… priceless!

  • Don’t end your date outside the restaurant
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For you guys out there, girls/women like to be picked up, and if not, dropped off after the first date.  This gives you the chance to get closer to her heart and inside her mind… that is if you want to. No matter how old you are, owning a car or walking, just drop her off her house after dinner.  It’s a bonus point for you.

But girls, it’s nice to end the first date with a kiss. Only a kiss OK? let him wonder what will he be getting on your second date.

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That does not mean that you shouldn’t be yourself and act fake on your first date. Just keep in mind, as I mentioned from the beginning, the first impression is what matters.


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