ARE YOU DATING A YOUNGER MAN? YOU NEED TO READ THIS

The younger woman/older man relationship has been the tradition ever since I opened my eyes to life.  But nowadays, with the flip of the mind, all kinds of relationships are becoming normal… “The Trend”.  By younger men, I mean in their twenties and early thirties.

Let’s face it.  A woman in her 30s, 40s or 50s (divorced or single) dating a younger man who is more than five years younger – A COUGAR- is an adventure, especially when her biological clock starts ticking fast. 

Most of us prefer an older man, specifically a gentleman who takes us out on a fancy dinner, proposes a sumptuous glass of whiskey, bewitches us with his “Johnny Depp” subjects and foxy smile throughout the night, till you can’t wait to finally be in his arms. It all depends whether you are the dominant (younger men would be a challenge for you) or the submissive type (older men are on top of your menu).

Several physical and spiritual reasons lie behind the desire of dating a younger man.  It all depends on your character.  Some women I know had this experience at least once in their dating life, and all were happy about it…. for a while.  The cons of this relation appear later when things get serious with you being the older. The relation might blossom into a long-lasting one, but there will be times when you feel the glitch.  If you’re looking for just the fun of it, then it is all about the pros.

PROS:

You feel young again:

Younger men are driven by energy, adventure and thirst for life and this awakens the dynamism in you.  You feel young in the company of a young spirit; he takes you back to the old days when you had the crazy kind of fun.  Younger men are more spontaneous than older men. 

“I prefer to date older women because they don’t try to act older like younger girls but because they try to act younger” – Heath Ledger

Road trips, music concerts, beach activities, game nights… older men may often be exhausted to do all these.

Younger men have fewer responsibilities:

In general, young men don’t have much responsibilities to worry about; they are free whenever you feel like going crazy for the night or run away for the weekend.  You don’t have to worry about meeting another man’s kids and putting all your effort to please them. The older you get, the more you will bear: kids, work,…

Less baggage:

We all have past relationships and bad experiences.  Younger men are baggage free, unlike older men who think they know it all.  This leaves you with the privilege to be their life tutor and lead them the way you want.  The less experienced they are, the more open they will be in the relationship.

He’s always impressed by you

He knows you passed through a lot in your life and handled it well.  You don’t need to prove it to him to attract his attention.  He respects your independence and admires your own person. 

You’re in control

Remember, you’re the older one with an interesting life baggage.  Besides, with age, comes power.  This is how younger men encounter you.  You feel at ease to rule and stay in control of the situation.  When younger men get the attention of an older and more experienced woman, their self- confidence is boosted and they feel they own the world.

If you sense that he’s dating you just for his self-confidence, just walk out because those nice gestures you are getting from him will vanish once he finds someone else, younger or same age as you, who will make him feel the same way.

You boil under the sheets

Men in their twenties and thirties have more stamina – they keep you going for hours, multiple times a day.  They are always hungry for more, they love grabbing every chance to have you, and are open to twisted ideas you improvise in bed, respecting your experience and knowledge and following their passion to get it all from you.  I confess, it IS the kind of appreciation we women thrive for!

“Older women are best, because they always think they may be doing it for the last time” – Ian Fleming

I’m still stating general facts.  To the older hunks out there, I shout: your energy is admired, but your kind is golden, so “I SEE YA”.

CONS:

Younger men sometimes act childish

Being much older, you are more mature than him (I’m still generalizing).  For instance, if you’re dating a 25-year-old guy when you’re in your late thirties, he might spend hours playing video games with him friends, going for beer nights and getting wasted with his buddies… over beer! 

Even though you feel you are way ahead of these kinds of nights out as it has been ages since you last had this, and as long as there are no Doritos under your couch and beer cans all over your living room, and considering that he doesn’t embarrass you in public, you can still enjoy your special relationship, and use this time to meet up with your friends or relish your relaxing time alone.

You have a different view of relationships

Younger men are mostly afraid of commitment.  They might also be open for polyamory and find it normal.  Your perspective of romance might not be the same.  Being young, they find it difficult to commit in marriage when you already had your share of fun and multiple relationships.

If you’re old school and looking for a serious commitment, get your grips together and LEAVE!

Different lifestyles

His friends are single and young – yours are married and mature

His concept of a fun night is drinking beer with the gang in a beer pub till 3.00 – yours is sipping a glass of wine in a classy pub till 1.00

Getting drunk, flirting and acting “college” weird is their moto – yours is maintaining your elegant behavior in style.

His idea of relaxing is in the company of his comrades –  yours is in the company of your partner.

His wild vacation is south beach Miami crazy beach parties – yours is Ibiza.

He may not be looking into the future… yet

Your biological clock is ticking; you are looking to have your own family.  A younger man might not be his target.  He respects you and makes you feel a Goddess, but that’s just it.  He can coward away from responsibilities and too much pressure.  He might not be ready to give up his freedom being young and having years ahead of him to get devoted to family matters. 

I don’t think this man is ready to become a dad for kids who mess up the place and cry to be fed.

Don’t call me mom!

Some younger men are looking to be “mothered” by an older woman. Being in position to make his plans, prepare his meals, take the decisions, keep his house stylish and clean, and teach him how to deal with his manager…

These are things his mom should do, not me!   Moms love unconditionally; I’m terribly sorry honey, I have kids of my own to mother.  I want to be loved and pampered.  I’m not here to fix your life, I aim to have a partner!

He may be financially imbalanced

You’re already in a high position after years of hard working, while he’s still getting on in his career, even if he’s in his early thirties.  He still has a long path to reach your position (if you’re in your forties or older). 

Are you looking for an expensive night out? Do you love getting gifts on special occasions? Well, he might not be able to cover the expenses for all that.  You may even have to pay for your luxury vacations.

As long as you’re happy being with him, then why not!  Happiness comes with a price (literally).

You may be socially judged

Even though this combination is becoming more common, there’s always this traditional generation who believes a successful relationship is between a man their age or older.  Unfortunately, most parents and grandparents belong to that group.  They are indispensable, you can’t run away from their sharp comments.

If you have a strong bond with your partner, this should not be a problem.  When they find out how strong your commitment is, they will savor your relationship.

Biology

One thing I can tell you regarding this matter, unfortunately women age before men biologically.  At 60, you can find a good looking man attracting young women with his powerful suit and controlling looks (he must be divorced; if he’s in his sixties and still unmarried, RUN), but a woman at the age of 60 (even with the presence of lifting and other plastic surgeries) can’t hide age.  Please consider that next time you target a long relationship with a younger man.  

“An old woman who dates much younger men is called a “COUGAR”. An old man who dates much younger women is called “RICH”

Do you think you will be able to date a younger guy?

Perhaps you already are, and it’s going well.  Society makes a big deal out of it.  With few minor adjustments on both your part and his, and with the will to make it work, you will have a successful and long life relationship together.   When the spark of romance blossoms between two people, sometimes age doesn’t matter.

J’aime La Vie!