Ridiculously Dumb Things Couples Fight Over
We have all been through that feeling when your blood boils and your face turns to red, your stomach is in knots and bad thoughts circulate your mind. Sometimes I even feel my hair electrified because of rage and anger. It’s ok to feel this way; all couples fight from time to time, it’s a normal process in a relationship.
As much as a couple might be in love, fighting in inevitable. By fighting, I don’t mean the big fatal fights, but those 10-minute silly ones with no real significance, which later you find yourselves hugging and laughing about after realizing how dumb it was to fight over. Most couples have gone through these fights; it drives both of you insane at the time.
“The perfect couple? Yeah, they fart and fight too”
After several surveys with couples, here are the most frequent dumbest reasons, which I, as a married woman, approve of following my long experience with my partner. There are over 200 stupid reasons, but here are the most frequent.
We’ve all been there:
1- She is sexy:
He: I find Megan Fox sexy
She: Geez! Look at her, there’s no plastic surgery she hasn’t done. She’s not natural. But Brad Pitt is handsome.
He: Oh really? good, then go to Brad Pitt. Good for you.
2- Toothpaste cap:
She: Can’t you for once close the toothpaste cap, and clean the toothpaste in the sink behind you? Or at least throw the empty one.
He: I don’t have time for this. If it really bothers you, get a separate one for yourself.
“We fight, we kiss, we hug, we text, we argue, we laugh, we smile, we love,… that’s us” – The Love Bite.
3- What movie to watch:
She: Which movie would you like to watch?
He: I don’t know, you choose.
She: you never take a decision. I don’t care. Whatever you want.
He: ok, let’s watch Avengers
She: No no, not that movie.
He: Grrrr… typical
4- Where to eat:
He: Where do you want to eat?
She: I don’t know, it doesn’t matter
He: Ok, we go to Bill’s for pizza.
She: No not that place. Anything but this place
He: ok, we eat Chinese?
She: No no something else. Not much into Chinese now. Choose anything else.
He: You know what, I’m ordering McDonalds.
5- Don’t touch my belongings:
She: I’m throwing your old shoes, you should get new ones
He: Don’t you dare touch my belongings. I want to wear it everyday.
She: You’re so old and I don’t want to go out with such a guy.
6- The food Tupperware is too small:
She: Do you think the remaining food can fit in that Tupperware?
He: No it needs a bigger one. Don’t you have any view of dimensions?
She: I think it will fit. It’s my kitchen, you can watch your game now. Wish I never asked.
7- Who ate my Doritos?
She: I bought a big bag of Doritos. Did you see it anywhere?
He: Yes I ate it last night
She: How can you do that? It’s mine. I got it for Sunday night Netflix movie. You’re so mean.
8- Bed cover:
He: Please give me some of the bed cover, I need to cover myself when sleeping.
She: What do you mean? I’m stealing your cover? If you’re not happy sleeping next to me, go elsewhere.
9- Take off the PJs:
She: You’ve been wearing the same PJs for several days. Please change it, wear some clothes during the day. I need to wash it; or your torn shirt which should be in the garbage by now.
He: I don’t care what you think, I’ll wash them. And don’t think about throwing my torn t-shirt. I like it. Just let me enjoy my day.
She: Go left. No no, go right.
She again: I told you, you should have gone right.
He: You haven’t said that, I said right, you said left. You know what? I’m driving so let me do so properly. When you drive, you do whatever you want… believe it or not, that’s what happens every time we go out.
11- I’m cold, turn the AC off:
He: Can you turn the AC on?
She: No, I’m cold. I’ll get the flu and you’ll be the reason behind that. You want me to get sick, just say it.
11- Put your phone away:
She: Put your phone away please, sit with me for a while. Tell me about your day. I’m not knowing anything about you!
He: I have to answer these messages. Wait!
She: You used to love spending time with me. You don’t love me anymore. I’m out. Have kids with your phone.
12- Space in the closet:
He: Can you please leave me some space in MY closet? It’s the only one I have for my clothes, you have all the rest.
She: Get me a new one, I leave your closet alone. I’m not going to throw my clothes out for you. (that’s me)
13- Changing TV channels:
She: Please stop changing channels. (I always argue with my husband about the remote control. I feel dizzy when he changes the channels so fast.
She: ok fine, I’m going to the room. Don’t follow me. Forget about approaching me for a week.
14- Why don’t you listen?
She: I just want you to listen to my problem, I don’t want a solution. I need someone to just listen.
He: You never do what I advise you to anyway.
15- I am too tired to go out!
She: I want to go out with my friends
He: I’m so tired… She’s mad, he sleeps on the couch.
Next day: He: Tom called and I told him we will join them.
She: I’m tired. I have a terrible headache… He ends up sleeping on the couch.
16- You’re going to throw away the food:
She: I cooked today, try not to finish the whole thing now, I want to leave some for the kids. Don’t feel like cooking tomorrow.
He: You’re going to throw it away because the kids won’t eat the same food the next day…. He ends up eating it all later as the kids haven’t eaten it… or throw it away (and that’s me too).
17- Dirty clothes in the wrong place:
She: When will you learn to take off your clothes IN the room, and drop the dirty ones IN the laundry basket?
He: If you are “too busy” to remove it, just leave it on the floor… He ends up sleeping on the couch… with his dirty laundry.
18- Why did you like her picture?
She: Why did you like Kathy’s picture? Now she will think you like her. Do you like her? Are you cheating on me? Why don’t you like my pictures that fast?
He: Please! I don’t feel like arguing… He sleeps with no dinner.
19- Where to go on Holidays:
She: My parents invited us for Christmas eve. let’s ask the kids.
He: Last year we were at your parents. This year going to my parents. And don’t drag the kids into this… They end up going to her parents.
20- Hair in the sink:
She: Why can’t you clean the hair in the bathroom sink? Do you want me to know that you shaved? Just say it. I hate this!
He: Just turn the water and rinse it down. Women!
“I want our relationship to be like Tom and Jerry. No matter how many times we fight, we won’t be apart” – The Love Bite
21- Take your time:
He: It’s almost 8.30, where are you? We need to leave. What are you doing all this time, are you preparing yourself for your wedding or what?
She: Why don’t you mind your own business. I need 10 more minutes... And they don’t leave before 40 minutes.
22- Get dressed:
She: At 8:15- We should be at the restaurant at 8.30. Stop playing on your phone and go get dressed.
He: It’s still early. We will arrive on time.
She: How did I ever end up marrying you, how!
23- Let me sleep!
Him at 6:00 – going to the toilet, closing the door roughly.
At 6:45 – Him: Slamming the cupboard door while she’s still asleep.
At 7:15 – He: Wake up, you want some coffee?
She: I hate my life. Why don’t you let me sleep, it’s the weekend. Please leave me alone. I miss my single days!
24- Stop sending emails from bed:
She: I need to sleep. Why do you always remember to send emails at that time of night? Turn it off!
He: ……………………………. No answer. As if he’s alone in the room.
25- Turn off the alarm:
He: Turn off the alarm. It’s still 6:30 AM. Why did I ever get married why!
She: I need to wake the kids up for school. They are your kids too. I’m the only one caring in this house. I don’t need all this. I give up.
26- Why don’t you put your glass in the sink?
She: Are you really going to drink the rest of the water in your glass? No, I’m sure you’re going to forget about it on the living room table and drink with a fresh one. Why don’t you just put it in the sink after drinking?
27- Clean the toilet after usage:
She: Why! Why would you do this to me! Why don’t you remember to clean the toilet seat after you finish? I feel like I’m in jail.
He: Why do you always say it’s me! Can’t you consider that it might be the kids?
28- Don’t leave your wet towel on the bed sheets:
She: Stop leaving your wet towel on the bed. Why can’t you ever learn to hang it in the toilet after your shower?!
He: I’m in a hurry.
29- Close the closet door:
She: Why can’t you close the closet door?
He: I might need something else from it later, so why bother closing it?
She: Men are weird! I do everything around here.
30- Ways to put the silverware in the dishwasher:
She: Please put the silverware face down in the dishwasher. And rinse them before.
He: Why? What’s the difference? It’s all the same…. and he puts the silverware face up. And why rinse them before? All will be clean after dishwashing.
She: I don’t need your help anymore, please go watch TV and leave my kitchen.
31- Turn off the light when you leave the room:
He: Turn off the kitchen light when you’re not there. Save some energy!
She: I’m still in the kitchen, can’t you see? Please leave the light on! Now you’re feeling like saving? Why don’t you think of that when you sleep with the TV on?
32- Whose turn is it for the garbage:
She: Your turn to throw the garbage.
He: (Calling his son) James, throw the garbage, help your mother.
She: Ughh always trying to get out of his duties. Poor kids!
33- Put a new toilet paper:
She: Why can’t you put new toilet paper! Am I the only one who cares in this house?
He: No big deal! Why don’t you put one now that you’re in the bathroom? Don’t get mad, your blood pressure will fly high, not good for your health.
She curses her life… again.
34- Cheating on her in her dreams:
She: Waking up in the morning – When did you last see Emma? Are you going out with her? I dreamt that you were cheating on me with her, it’s a sign. Are you? Don’t talk to me anymore.
He: I swear you’re insane!
35- Why don’t you help:
She: I always empty the dishwasher and do the laundry.
He: And I always maw the lawn and help with house cleaning… She’s mad she has nothing to say.
36- Jealous of the pillow:
He: You’re hugging the pillow and not me. Are you bored of me?
She: Come on, the pillow comforts me, please!
37- Stop burning my food:
He: Why can’t you grill my cheese without burning it, just for once.
She: slamming the pan and going inside – do it yourself.
38- Occupying the shags:
She: I need to go to the toilet… after 5 minutes from saying that, the bathroom is occupied; he’s inside. Do you do this just to piss me off?
He: Won’t be long…. 10 minutes later: Ughh I hate when this happens, and it always happens to me.
(my husband always enters the toilet when I mention that I need it, and it’s frustrating believe me)
“A relationship with no arguments is a relationship with a lot of secrets”
39- Whose turn to turn off the light?
She: Your turn to turn the light off.
He: No it’s your turn, I turned it off last night.
She: Why am I the one who does everything around the house?
40- If we win the lottery:
She: If we win the lottery, we will travel around the world and get a new house.
He: No, if we win, I’m getting a Ferrari car and a new Playstation. Wait, and buy an entertainment place to play cards and smoke cigar with the guys.
She: I hope we will never win the lottery, better off without it!
41- Let me sleep!
He: In the middle of the night – Hello there baby! Come closer.
She: Please, I need to relax, long day tomorrow. It’s 3.00 am in the morning. Just go back to skeep.
He: I need another woman. You are not enough for me anymore…. and they fight … ughhh.
42- Wall color:
She: For the bedroom, I want Salmon color on this wall.
He: Are you nuts? You want me to sleep in a girly room?
43- These are MY hangers:
She: Why are you taking my hangers? This is my side, leave my hangers for me.
He: I’m not stealing your hangers, I don’t even get close to your side… But she knows he’s taking them… they fight.
44- Forgot all about it:
She: You forgot to get me flowers on Valentine’s day
He: Who believes in Valentine? It’s all a commercial thing just to rob people their money. (My husband says that to me every year, but sometimes tries to ignore his beliefs to please me).
She: Why can’t you do something I like for once? He ends up sleeping anywhere in the house far from me.
45- Get your hands off my food!
He: Stop eating my fries, I asked you if you want anything before ordering and you said you want nothing!
She: I ate a few fries, bite me!
46- Am I fat?
She: Do I look fat?
He: No honey, you look great
She: Why are you lying to me?
47- You are loud!
She: Honey, you need to do something about your snoring.
He: ME? Seems you’re talking tp the wrong person.
She: Are you serious? grrr
48- Who should shut the door?
He: Did you shut the door?
She: Yes I did. You were the last to come in.
He: No it was you who entered last.
She: I can hear the couch calling out for you.
49- Going backwards in time:
She: Remember when you made fun of me on New Year’s eve 2010 in front of your parents and friends? How could you do that to me!
He: Are you serious? I don’t remember what I had for breakfast today!
50- Walking the dog:
She: It’s your turn to walk the dog. It was my turn yesterday.
He: I’m so tired, I had a long exhausting day at work. You take him out today.
She: What do you mean, I’ve been playing and relaxing all day?
“Don’t worry when I fight with you, worry when I stop because it means there’s nothing left for us to fight for” – The Love Bite
I can go on and on forever, but my article will not end anytime soon.
“People have fights, it’s ok. It’s good actually. You know, it’s healthy. If you don’t have fights, all these bad chemicals build up and you get ulcers and bad skin. So you have to have some fights for the sake of your skin.” (That’s what Sookie in Gilmore girls told Lorelai when she had a fight with Luke).
“Even if we fight a lot, I still want you in my life”
People have fights. Every bad fight can seem like the fight… but in fact, these are the silly fights we are talking about.